[Pre-requisite: the article "Towards a Better Understanding of Islam". Co-requisite: comfortable place, open mind, 6/6 eyesight or compatible, suitable time and a cup of tea/coffee.]
* Summarized from a longer version written for the local MSA newsletter.

Let's begin by subscribing to the fact that Islam is a complete, unique, comprehensive and integrated system. It has to be taken in its entirety, that is, processes of 'import', 'cut and paste'- excuse my computer language - to or from other systems are fruitless. In fact, partial application of the Islamic rules and regulations in a society that does not believe in Islam as a comprehensive way of life is a recipe of failure.

The importance of the family issue stems from the fact that family is the foundation of each and every society. The strength or weakness of this building block makes its distinctive mark on the social and cultural structure of a society. Wise remedies of a weak nation as well as destructive recipes for a well-maintained one, start and end with the family. Today, the family, or what is left of it, is under vicious attack from various fronts, and the 'gender bomb' is among the most destructive weapons. It splits, mutilates, alienates and polarises the corner stone of the society and turns what is meant to be complementarity, harmony, love and respect into two proteins (chromosomes) with eternal enmity. Just look around and if you don't get hit by a flying shrapnel, make sure you are still on planet earth.

It seems that the ancient principle ( a damn wrong one!) governing the family is still applicable - I mean might is right, and I do understand the reaction by the victims (though I may not see any justification for any extreme). According to Newton's third law, a reaction may not overcome the action, so let's opt for actions in the first place. To this end, I consult Islam - my choice for a complete, comprehensive and perfect code of life. Islam itself, as well as my scientific career, tell me to investigate before passing any judgement based on practices by people who may not be true representatives of this or that idea (for either good or bad reasons).

It may be surprising, but this 'gender issue' never existed in Islam. Of course, it did and does exist in the tradition and deep ignorance of muslims. Others helped propagate this wrong (and bad) image either on purpose or due to 'ignorance with good intention'. To council ourselves, this is not the end of the universe, since the sources of Islam are still intact and available in the most convenient form for any truth seeker.

A quick comparison of the status of women in ancient societies,the 'civilized' world of today, and some invented, inherited or imported traditions and practices by muslims reveal different versions of "colonization", supression and ill-treatment. You may scan through practices ranging from denying the existence of a female's soul to selling her (it?) in the market (believe it or not), to burying her alive in childhood or , in recent days, treating her as either a marketing or entertainment tool. Other extremes include a twenty -four-hours-a-day of home and only home, considering her name a taboo not to be mentioned in public and in some societies offering her to guests and the list is endless. Other diseases should not be overlooked and they apply to both genders, but that's a different story. I should point out again that this does not mean that every one out there is getting nuts.

If this hurts your hearing system, I'm sorry, but the truth is never sweet. There is no need to specify who did, or still does, what. All we need to do is recognize the existence of a problem and search for means to remove it in its entirety. There has to be an unbiased solution that balances the existence of the society by ensuring that the family building block is safe and sound; moreover, that this family is based on recognition, love, understanding, cooperation, integration and complementarity, and not on scattered court rulings here and there that come after a long struggle when it is too late and we can't take back the sufferings. So, what kind of solution does Islam have to offer?

The Arabian code of life in the pre-Islamic era was unfair not only in the family issues, but in most aspects of life. It was the entire 'law of the jungle'that Islam declared, very clearly, as 'totally broken and need to be replaced'. And since Islam is for all human beings, the new system becomes available to all other nations by way of nice discussion and wise presentation as a matter of choice without any pressure to force it down the throats of others.

The Islamic comprehensive fix is inherent in the fact that it established its own system of life based on the supreme knowlege of Allah (S&W) who created life and the living things as well as other things. Before Islam, women did not organize protests, but Allah (S&W), the ever knowledgebale with the utmost justice, did not leave it neither to the victims nor to the accused to write, in stone, the new rules and regulations governing the family.

The social outline of the family in Islam fits very nicely in the total Islamic scheme of life (one that has purpose) and is compatible with other parts of this heavenly defined and oriented framework. The unity of origin, the equality of humanness, the principle of reward for good deeds and punishment for bad ones irrespective of gender, the social structure and relations that have rules and regulations are but very few aspects of the utmost care given to the family part. Besides this healthy system (based on prevention rather than cure), a clear, simple, fair and effective troubleshooting, should something malfunction in the rarest of occasions, is prescribed again by the Creator of the family. Read if you like about "the rules and regulations of Allah" in relation to marriage issues (it is repeated several times in 2:229-230) and try to understand 4:34 and 2:228 in light of this and the rest of the Qur'an together with the traditions of prophet Muhammad (p.b.u.h) who was the best to understand and apply these rules. The status of women as mothers, daughters, sisters and wives receives so much attention in Qur'an and Hadith. In 9:71-72, we read about the code of existence of believers (both genders) and their reward. In the beginning of Surah # 58 comes the ultimate care as Allah (S&W) 'listened' to the complaints by a woman about her husband and in Surah # 66, we read that Allah (S&W) set an example for those who believed and those who did not: what was the example? I also find no escape from pointing out 16:58-59, 24:30-31 and 33:35, 59 among others.

The prophet's teachings in this respect need to be consulted as well. From his answer to the one who asked: "who is the most entitled to my good company" to his counseling about raising kids (especially daughters ) to his teachings about marital relationship to the examples from his life. Women participated in all aspects of life (within the Islamic code of life governing both men and women and according to each one's resources and/or restrictions). They attended prayers and listened to his teachings, they asked questions and narrated Hadith, they accepted and rejected people who asked for their hands, they inherited and had their own wealth and they went to the battle field against aggression (not as commandos, but for equivalent noble missions).

The true and genuine Islamic system offers to build a family that produces a society free from bigotry, gender dominance and intolerance; a society based on love, self - and other - respect, complementarity, understanding and cooperation - a society in which modesty, dignity, chastity and honor are the greatest common features ... a society where my duties are your rights and my rights are your duties... a society free from crime, sex abuse and sexual harrassment, where rape alarms and mace are no longer needed, since the society rules and applies the divine regulations. The authority of the society is felt every where in accordance with the principle of encouraging good and preventing evil. Any cry for help or against injustice is sure answered because it has the leverage of the whole society. Those with bad intentions calculate their risks in advance and decide to quit on their own; they hide underground and Islam does not dig to find them until they surface, but I need to dig the keyboard for a period, leaving the reader with peace - here's one.